5 years ago I had never heard of Empath let alone find out I am one. We are the nice guys, who just want peace. Always there to lend a hand. But little did I know that was my biggest detriment.
Empaths have the ability to sense things, a strong intuition which can be their greatest ali if we allow it. Tuning in and going inwards is needed but Empaths are highly suggestible, that’s to positive and negative energies. Being grounded in our truth is necessary and critical for our growth and life purpose. I paid a high price to gain this knowledge, following my HIV diagnosis, I got to experience firsthand what it meant to be too focused on the higher chakras.
Empaths need to be grounded and most importantly movement. I remember in 2014 when I started weightlifting I felt so connected so in tune to everything. Naturally Empaths are connected to source that is a given, we were born with a negative ego, forever seeking validation from others and approval. The people pleasing is a common trait. When surrounded by fear based energy we sense it’s off but sometimes don’t want to offend so stick around. Our need to be liked trumps our own wellbeing sometimes.
These realisations have caused me to look hard, into every faucet of my life, from a young girl and every relationship I have had. It’s made me realise where I had been giving myself away so easily and the reason behind it, it makes sense that we naturally want to give, we just need to start with ourselves. Apart from my own story of experiencing a burnout I hear many stories of people with chronic illness, autoimmune and when you dig deep there’s trauma, there’s unforgiveness, theirs feelings of lack, regret, shame, resent, guilt. There’s no time to self care is a big one. But self care is essential if we want to live well. So in sharing this information I know it will help many people at least understand that wholeness is possible. If you are experiencing any kind of dis-ease it could be that you are an Empath. It could mean that you have given so much to the world and there’s nothing left to give to you. I want you to know that it’s possible to return to your highest glory.
If any of this information resonates then it’s likely your an Empath. Awareness is the first step to any healing, and technically if you are out balance because you are giving too much these steps are really going to help.
1. Get Grounded in your physical.
This is a must with no negotiations! Exercise is optional but movement is necessary. Find something that works for you, you are unique. I would definitely look into discovering your Dosha ( Ayurveda )
Understanding that I am Pitta dosha has helped me to understanding that my body needs cooling and calming. I do good with cycling and running anything where I am forced to focus on breathe. Getting oxygen into my body and pumping blood around. I love weights and pushing my body to extreme. I know what feels right for me.I have to exert my energy also because I have a Vata Mind. Constantly creating and sometimes it’s hard to shut off, just having exercise in my life keeps me more grounded in the physical, healthy mind, healthy body.
It’s really easy to take on other people’s energy as an Empath. After Reiki we are taught to wash our hands with cold water. I have been using cold showers recently also and really feel the difference especially because I practice the breathework. Breathework is a powerful tool to keep in my mind if you feel scattered in your energy. Being in nature is going to do wonders for your world. Increase foods that nourishes you and that are nutrient dense. It’s not about trendy diets it’s about listening to your own body which I will get into more later.
2.Have strong boundaries
The Empaths strong need to help combined with the desire to be accepted by the world is an opportunity for many people to take advantage. Narcissists love Empaths same way Empaths believe theirs a good soul in everyone, somewhere. When you step into your world each day picture yourself covered in a Rainbow cloak but it’s not thick, it’s transparent. Allowing the good energy in filtering out fear based energy.
Or you can use a zipping up technique, imagine a big zipper on your body keeping all your energy in so that it doesn’t leak. Always keep your energy in your heart, your focus on your own energy is primary. You cannot give to others if you are depleted. Don’t rush into help people based on emotions, say No and give yourself time to think things through. Empaths can feel obliged to help and particularly if it’s close friends, family. I adopted a small rule if you know they would definitely help you in need and have been there for you it’s something to consider. It’s easy to be taken advantage of if you are an Empath, your need to alleviate suffering is so strong. But you cannot help everyone and sometimes people need suffering as their teacher.
3. Just notice your feelings
Whatever they may be. Sometimes we just aren’t honest enough about the shitty feels everything has to be love and light when really we just want to scream our hearts out and tell someone to fuck off. It’s all ok, sometimes suppressing the negative emotions is way worse. I remember going through a difficult time, but really continuing with work and helping others when I should of admitted my suffering, got the help and support I needed. I thought I had to stay positive throughout my pain rather than acknowledge it and grow through it. I eventually dealt with my emotions but only because my body was screaming out to me what the fuck have you done. You can easily feel people’s pain as an Empath and the need to help can overtake your own needs. This is why stay grounded is essential and one way is to always really listen, the imbalance in the Sacral Chakra is being overactive and being over emotional and that can be taking on other people’s emotions as your own. There’s no doubt what I experienced was a complete body breakdown and burnout. I would never want anyone to experience that, limit what you see on Social Media, set up a timer like me because even social media and everyone sharing their lives we can absorb so much energy.
What do you watch?
What do you listen to?
Do you notice the things that drain you?
Who makes you feel good?
Who drains you the most?
It’s definitely not easy removing people from your life who you feel are draining you. These can be family members, even your own children. This is why self care and nurturing yourself is a high priority not a luxury but a necessity that needs to be included in your everyday life.
4. Listen to what you need.
Ok so earlier I mentioned being more in tune with what your body needs, this becomes easier the more still you are and less noise from the outside world. There are so many diets in the world but you are unique and something I share with my clients is bio individuality, one persons food is another persons poison. It’s not just about food, we spoke about movement in first step. But maybe you need an art hobbie, you might need a creative project, a home project. You might have to dig into your passions, remember what lights you up and run for the hills. It took me a long time to get excited for the things that once brought me joy. But I remembered eventually and the trauma will be a distant memory, the HIV something I just needed to experience to fully understand wholeness.
If you’re life is becoming full of busyness and overwhelm, if your struggling with sleep and regular routine then take time to structure some real down time to recharge. Remember simple is best, don’t over complicate anything!
5. Stop overanalysing everything.
Stop looking for the reasons why things have happened. Whatever has happened, an illness, a break up, some kind of loss. Stop trying to predict everything and control every aspect of your life. Stop listening to the opinion of others. Just stop! Breathe. Hold your hand on your heart, go inwards what do you desire?
How do you really want to feel?
Many Empaths can lose themselves to others, we want to be liked, approved of, loved even. Your soul really does want to be expressed in this life. You won’t be liked by everyone and that’s ok. Loving yourself first is necessary and it’s not selfish.
Who would you be if you wasn’t afraid?
Do you listen to others rather than the calling of your own soul which is yearning to be expressed?
Your messages will never make you afraid, but you will be required to step up. And you can do it, and it’s going to be ok. You deserve to be who you are, not what other people want you to be.
Empaths tend to dim their light, they want to blend in with others who have dimmed their light. Rather than shine as they are, they shrink so as to not make others feel bad. It’s important to shine, you set an example and show a possibility for others.
Keep going in for your enquiries , because the answers are not out there. Don’t doubt your abilities, gifts, talents but conserve your energy wisely. Take as much time as you need, we have until forever.